You never really realize who you cherish the most until they're gone-
Just ask me I was there once, here's my story......

When I was 16 years old I got a girl pregnant, we got married because she was pregnant, we barely knew eachother. The baby was born two days after my 17th birthday. I was scaried to be a father at such a young age but my father told me that I made my bed and now I must lie in it and face this situation like a man. But I guess I couldn't handle it, at 17 I was living with my wife and baby girl. I couldn't handle all the pressures of a house of my own, bills I had to pay, a wife and a new baby, so I turned to the only thing that seemed to solve all of my problems....drinking. This lone decision would be a costly one for me.

The more I began to drink the angeryer I became about my life, then I began to beat up my wife, blaming her for all of my anger, frustration and making my life the way it was, when it wasn't even her fault to begin with, we ventured into this together.

Well one day when my daughter was about to turn two my wife left me, I came home to an empty house and that's when I realized I had lost the only two people that I've ever really loved in my life. I vowed to myself that I would streighten out my life and I quit drinking that day. I begged and pleeded on my hands and knees begging my wife to come back and not to take my little girl away from me. But I knew in my heart that I had lost them forever......

It is now three years later and my little girl is five years old. I have lived alone in this house that I once shared with my wife and daughter for seven years now, I just can't bring myself to move out of this house it holds too many memories for me. I've even tried dating a few times over the years but those woman could never compare to my wife. I've got their photographs on a nightstand by my bed, a few on the mantel and literally thousands in my head, I think about them everyday and I've never given up trying to get my wife back, over the three years that we lived together I learned to love her, I hope she loved me too.....

Because of the alcohol I missed my daughter's first steps and her first word and now "I Love You Daddy" is something I seldom hear from her anymore, I can't believe how fast she's growing up, my life's not supposed to be like this, we should be a family and whenever I look at her I realized just how much that I've really missed in my daughter's life.
It really hurts me to watch my little girl Molly grow up in pictures.....

I send my wife money for my daughter, I do my best to be a father to Molly but it doesn't compare to what I'm paying with my heart......

There's just one question that's lying heavy on my mind-
"Will Molly understand the reasons why I wasn't around for her, to watch her grow up? To chase all the boys away and to approve and disapprove of her boyfriends"
~~~ I hope so..........

It takes everything I have to keep the tears inside but I would give anything just to turn back time so I don't have to watch my baby girl grow up in pictures........